A dry run to Skeggy rally the week before, to check the scoots and more importantly check I can ride after struggling with bloody arthritic joints for the past year, and I'm happy to go. From 25 degrees one weekend to a light smattering of snow on the Thursday, I love summer. Friday morning its 50MPH winds and sense prevails. Sues mate Amanda is going too so its safer in the car for them, Sues scoot is loaded onto the trailer ,( plus comforts for my old bones ) and we set off around 1030hrs for the 110 miles to Hinckley via Wragby , where I was meeting up with Jinx for the ride up. I'd got possibly 15 miles on the LML doing quite well until a juggernaut pulled straight through a cross roads on top of me, forcing me onto the grass verge to avoid him, another second and I wouldn’t be writing this.
Arrived at Wragby and found Jinx on his trusty GTS, and the girls with a flat tyre on the trailer, so after finding a garage to pump it up, they tootled off and me and Stu went our way, a shortcut through Lincoln instead of round the gale force bypass slowed us up a bit, but we made good time and finally arrived knackered at The rally site. Hinckley United FC, to be met by Mitch on the gate doing a grand job for Leicester Phoenix SC, our hosts for the weekend. Sue and Amanda had only beaten us by 10 minutes after having to stop to blow the tyre up another 3 times. Leaving me with the dilemma, of finding a new tyre next morning to get home, more of that later.
Anyway first job Tent out the bag, stop fucking about trying to par ascend, and get it up. Solly was already there doing his best impression of Robinson Crusoe meets Bear Grylls and offered his services to Amanda to get it erected, the tent that is, Well she has got exceedingly nice tits. (much) more of those later. A freak gust of wind snapped my tent pole so it was a splint and tourniquet repair.
Members started arriving thick and fast. Coaty Angie and her daughter first then, Tony and Corrina , Mike Potts Jim Wright Brendan and Yam were with their civvy club nearby, Paul leader , Then Hoggy Tim, Kev, Paddy O’Malley and padlet on his pocket rocket, all blaming everyone else for the lack of direction. Simon got there as usual in a van, this time not the AA though. Why that 12 X 12, banner, Barbeque and chairs wouldn’t fit on Abominations sprint rack is beyond me.
The AFSC then did what we do best, muck in and pull together. With Solly's expert supervision we had the 12 x 12 up in record time before the rain started, and drinks in hand, then another drink then another then ano...... you get the picture.
Dave Condron turned up on his yellow peril but didn’t know us and we didn’t know him until Joey rocked up later two up with Helen all the way from Chester then a puncture on the field. Daz got there at some point as I remember seeing him stood next to me handing out some fantastic looking thrash CDs. Looks can be deceiving, I shall be having words with you fookers about what is good music and what isn’t :-)
Friday night a bit of a haze but I know I think I remember having a good night, I certainly had a stinking head at 0700 when I could finally stand the girls snoring no more. Then it was off into Hinckley to A find a tyre fitters and B find one that sold 12" metro tyres. And all done before 0900hrs.
1000hrs was the designated ride out time and we left for Breakfast at the Nags head in Stapleford for a fry up and a demonstration of how a sausage looks just like Alvin stardust’s ring finger. 25 of us made the ride out a fair few had more sense and nursed heads at the camp site. Hoggy isn’t known for sense but his scoot went P'tiing!!!! as we were ready to go. God\Allah\Dawkins loves the AFSC and kept the rain and wind to a minimum for the ride and our now traditional visit to a local cenotaph. We have visited the memorial wall at Hinckley before, I'd forgotten the north face of the eiger climb to get there but the old geezers made it... so did I.
So far so good till the ride back to the campsite. Sues scooter stopped and petrol pissed al over the road, a quick fix the pipe had come off. Unfortunately now Sue me Joey coaty and Dave were 5 minutes behind the rest and no idea where the campsite was. We managed to find our way back soon enough.
The sun was now over the yardarm at some point on the planet , so drinks out for a change. The rain started lashing down and the 12 X 12 became a godsend, we all gathered round Hoggy’s scoot as Joey spanner ninja'd to no no avail, the P'tiing was terminal the barbie was lit and the port came out. Tanky had some gay rum but there’s nothing wrong with that. Sausages chicken burgers were cremated and consumed , Si and Steve , thanks a bunch you worked your socks off . Coaty is entirely to blame for what happened next....... If he hadn’t brought doughnuts none would have been abused. Tongy , who you will remember was as quiet as a church mouse last year, came out of his shell, or more exactly from under his kilt.
A lull in the rain and the girls went off to get changed. They emerged as sexy police officers and kilts were up again. Contrary to common belief, Amanda’s t shirt was cut like that and it wasn’t her fault it had no buttons, she told me to lie to you. As usual the girls did us proud having a laugh and raising money for our chosen charity BLESMA. By this time my arthritis had caught up with me, and the Stella, port and Greene king IPA and I had to go lie down in the tent for an hour. I woke up at 0100hrs!!!!!!! So someone else will have to describe the preceding hours.
Next morning for the first thrash in history I didn’t have a hangover , we struck camp got the 12 x 12 packed etc and it was time to say our farewells always the lowest point of the thrash for me. The sun was out though, and we set off home without incident, In fact It went so well for me and Jinx , I was back home in under 2 and half hours. Wondering how I'd beaten Sue , till I checked my phone to find a text saying ring urgently. She had taken the A46 to Grimsby by mistake. It was the sat nav honest , not gassing with Amanda. Consequently I didn’t know a strap had snapped on the trailer and her scoot had fallen over! Fookin PK I said its nought but trouble.
Right then who is up for an end of season Thrash at Mablethorpe 15th -17th November?
The AFSC Thrash 2013 By Simon Cuerden
They say that The Brits are obsessed with the weather and this weekend was definitely shaped by the most foulest of stuff we have ever seen in a British Summer Time! That said, for those of us who were determined to grit teeth and don water proofs it turned out to be a spectacular AFSC Thrash!
Late Friday afternoon the club 12 x 12 was erected marshalled by the Ninja that is Solly, our Banner was flown and a suitable corner had been reserved by the advance party, Ravey’s Recce had been completed the week before so it was Thunderbirds are go!
Tents up and drinking trousers on and it was over to the “Do” where we sampled the two top bands of the evening along with copious amounts of beer, luckily we had all lined our tummies with two bottles of Port prior to leaving the AFSC encampment!
Sue and Amanda did there best to raise spirits and a raise they did, I can honestly say that Friday night disappeared in a blink of giggles and belly laughs. Dave and Mandy Allen were there with Dave running the Dance Room kicking out some awesome Rave and Festival Anthems. Mitch was working his socks off trying to juggle his club commitments and Rally Crew commitments but we did have time to bond in a bonding kind of way.
Daz did us a blinder with The AFSC Thrash CD and Steve’s Doughnuts were simply sex! Saturday morning had been planned meticulously by Ravey who decided to take a bath or summit three minutes before “H” Hour but he is a Cool Dude who is seldom shaken and slinked in to lead The AFSC out towards our ride out. The Pub Breakfast was just what the Doctor ordered and we enjoyed our first real sit down together. Sadly Hoggy’s Scooter decided to go “Pttting” and he didn’t make the ride out.
After breakfast we rode into Hinckley to visit the War Memorial and pay our respects. The weather was closing in but it never dampened our smiles and we beat the worst as we rode back to the camp site.
Steve and I sparked the BBQ up early to give a central focus and to warm hands and hearts as the weather mocked us. A couple of late arrivals with Paul and Karen Stannard and Graham Luke arriving after riding through some quite dreadful conditions. The Fun Games were cancelled and the camp site was deserted as most battened down or sought refuge in the bar. The AFSC Barbecued like it was 1999!
Toungy took a real shine to the Doughnuts and defiled a couple of these beauties, sadly I can not show you the pictures as I don’t want the web site to be closed down so I’ll allow your imagination to paint the sprinkled sweet picture of “Man Versus Food”
The 12 X 12 was invaluable and Audrey a million thank you’s for getting us this x. Sue and Mick went to get the last few bits we needed for our BBQ whilst Kilts where donned and beers were cracked open. Joey tried valiantly to fix Hoggy’s Scooter and I know he will be grateful for my supervision and running commentary whilst he performed this task. I would like to point out to our Joe that Helen was just as bad as me!
Kevin Francis and Tongy, Carlos and Ian, Natasha and Paddy, all just got on with it regardless of what appeared to be a miniature ice hurricane blowing through. We scoffed up and sank another couple of bottles of Port whilst The AFSC Ladies disappeared to get changed into their Charity Collecting Costumes, the Police Women’s outfits were quite Ding Dong! And they raised more than a few smiles every were they went collecting £178 for The British limbless Ex servicemen’s Association BLESMA. We would like to thank every one who gave and The AFSC wish to give a special thank you to Sue and her crew for going that bit further and making it a great way of raising awareness for this little know charity.
Saturday evening was as awesome as Friday with a Party Max attitude and an esprit de corps that would simply be impossible to capture in words so I shall just say that camaraderie and brotherhood is imagined by many, experienced by few.
Sunday morning and Solly and crew had struck camp, The AFSC club assets were dismantled and packed away with no fuss and the van was loaded up ready for the off. It is always sad during these times and it is hard to believe the distances people have ridden and the leap of faith people have made to party alongside like minded people. I could wax lyrical about what we all get out of our Thrash but I shall leave that to tongues more eloquent than I.
It was a privilege, The AFSC Thrash 2013 was a triumph and we look forward to our next one.
Thrash CD Track listing:
Betty Boo - Doin' the Do
Big Change Coming - The Stranglers
Chubby Checker - Toot
Cock Sparrer - England Belongs to Me
... Col Kilgore etc - Paradise Cowboy
Exploited - Army Life
FYC - Good Thing
joBoxers - Boxerbeat
The Radetzky March
Some Old matelot - ram It
Tenpole Tudor - Swords of a Thousand men
The Gonads - getting Pissed
the Jam - Little Boy Soldier
The Last Resort - Red White and Blue
The Mock Turtles - Can You Dig It?
The Pogues - The band Played Waltzing Matilda
The Undertones - Teenage Kicks
Frank Pop Ensemble - Breakaway
The Cramps - Bikini Girls With Machine Guns
Al Wilson - The Snake
Binky Baker et al - Toe Knee Black Burn