Isle of Wight 2004
Three write ups by AFSC members
just scroll down to read them all
New pictures salvaged from Dia and Elian's camera from The IOW 2004
  Dia leaving the IOW Ferry  
The ride from Thorney Island to the ferry port was only marred by a torrential down pour, these pictures were taken by Elian through the window of the back up van! In all my years scootering this was my greatest buzz! I can not wait to replicate this in Skegness! 2004 was a hoot but Skeggy is going to top it!
Nearly there Just out side the camp site Jimmy, Sharon john and Steve
Dia Dia's and Simon's Jimmy, Dickie, Trifle, Simon and Dave
Craig, Steve, Borgo and Marion Dickey's head, Her general, Dave and Simon Ian, Dave and Marion


Thank you Trifle for sending these in from The IOW
By Scott (Big Scotty) Johnstone

This year’s IOW rally was to be my first large scale gathering since taken up scootering again. I wasn’t looking forward to the long ride down there from Stafford (180 miles) on a kitted PX125. Luckily Fess’s luxury B&B was had a vacancy and that meant I could split the trip in two, result!


I left on Thursday lunchtime with a view to taken a leisurely ride down to Carterton, near Brize Norton to meet Fess for food, beer & bed. Just as I passed through Cannock it started to rain, nice. However it didn’t last long and after a few detours around Birmingham I arrived at Fess’s for teatime. A Quick bite to eat then off into the sprawling metropolitan town of Carterton for a few ‘quiet’ beers says Fess. Ten pints and a dodgy kebab later I’m in my scratcher getting all giddy about the ride down to Southampton the following day.

Up a crack of sparrow’s on Friday and yes, it’s hoofing it down. So the fess monster and I get all goretexed up and off we ride. Yes, it’s raining and doesn’t stop all the way down. But it’s all part of the experience I keep telling myself and Fess. We see a few scooters in the services on the way down, but not as many as I expected. That soon changes once we hit Southampton though. Loads of scoots everywhere, this is what I’m talking about! Eventually we find the right dock and we’re queuing for the ferry. Still raining when we board and get shuffled around the car deck to make way for the cage drivers…boo! Then straight up to the outside deck for lots of tabs and windiness!

When we arrive in Cowes and mount up our rides then man in hi-vis vest with an over inflated sense of self importance reads us the riot act about disembarking etc. However Fess and I were lucky, when we boarded we parked our scoots in front of the off loading gate, so we’re first ones off, cool! Then Fess reminds me that I’ll be leading the ride off the ferry and that the off ramp looks a bit steep and slippery and I better not stall my scoot in front of all these people watching. Nice one mate, no pressure then? But he didn’t count on my ice cool demeanour and I ride off the ferry like a seasoned rally go-er! Have that Fess!

Quick 10 minute journey to Ryde, through the town centre for a quick pose then off to the campsite at Smallbrook. We then spent 15 minutes trying to call/locate/see/smell the rest of the
AFSC crew but to no avail. So being highly paid NCOs in HM Forces we made an executive decision to pitch our matching tents (slightly gay) and find the rest of the gang later. No sooner had the tents gone up than Scotty’s gagging for a scoop, so off to the bar for double rounds and more smokes. Grooving to the tunes we spot the AFSC arriving, doubling back and for the between the campsite and van on baggage party duties. So we pop down for a quick introduction to all the ‘faces’ and it’s off to the bar again before heading doon toon. That’s where I met the enigmatic Trifle; I went all weak at the knees. Nice to meet you at last mate!

Friday night in Ryde – well what can I say? The pubs were great, the ice rink was okay (good band) but the best part was the
AFSC. Everyone out in club shirts, drinking, laughing, dancing, winding each other up, best night out I’ve had for ages. Chatting to the General was funny, first German guy I’ve met with a British sense of humour, top bloke! Meet some Brummie lads, one called Danny who was off his tits; bless him, but still funny as. Can’t remember much about getting back to the campsite, did we go for scoff Fess? Wished I’d taken my camera out, poor planning Scotty, poor planning!

Saturday was a write off. It suddenly dawned on me that I’m not 18 years old anymore, ouch. Never mind, sleep it off get up and do it all again, YES! Mooched around the trade stands for a patch and t-shirt then gorged on death burgers & hot dogs from the on-site food van (wasp colony). Caught a few winks in the afternoon, then off up to the campsite bar in the evening for more drinks and giggles. Fess and I decided to give town a miss as we were riding the next day, so we were going to have a few beers and then call it a night. NO CHANCE! Started off with good intentions but the
AFSC t-shirts were working their magic again. Loads of folks came up to chat, buy drinks for us, etc. Don’t know what you’ve impregnated the t-shirts with Simon, but it works a treat. Ended up hooped again and staggered off to my tent about 2.00am (so much for an early stack). I especially enjoyed the firework display, but not as much as Fess. He had the pleasure of a large spent rocket landing next to his tent and sticking into the ground about 4 inches, nice!
Sunday morning lie in was way too short. Packed up the tent and joined the rest of the AFSC for ride to a local pub for drinks, pics and Sunday dinner. My constitution was feeling a bit too delicate for a full on roast so I declined and had loads of softies instead (top RAF bloke me). I must admit the electric scooter/old lady caper was the funniest thing I’ve seen for a while and it still makes me laugh now. Fess and I had to be on our way to catch our ferry, so we said our sad farewells to the rest of the club and departed for Cowes. The rest of the ride back to Brize was mildly un-eventful, I only had two heat seizes on my scooter, both of which Fees thinks I imagined, git!


So all in my first IOW was a top weekend and a non-stop rollercoaster ride of shits and giggles with the rest of the
AFSC crew. Can’t wait for the next big meet-up! Holiday in Holland is on my calendar in pen…not pencil! Better start buttering up the wife now (steady Dickie).

Isle Of White 2004
By Rob James   

Don't get me wrong, we've done plenty with the kids this year, Gulliver's` Kingdom, Wacky Warehouses and
all those parties they get invited to. This week-end was going to be different though and my first ever
trip to the IOW.

We execute the plan and I drop off my young lad to stay the week-end at my brother Andy's place at Aldershot. Dave comes down from Cannock too and the 3 Musketeers set off at 7am to catch the ferry from Southampton.

The ride is great as we move out of Aldershot Camp. I see some Landrovers parked up in a line and
reminisce about the 7 years I spent in HM Forces. Onto the A31 and we're cruising in a small pack. My bro Andy looks larger on a scoot now than the 20 years ago we rode up to Scarborough and Morecombe. Young lads metamorphosied into 38, 39 and 41 year old scooter boys again.

We arrive early and embark to the end of the ferry with 20 odd scoots in total. The crossing smooth, we mount our scoots and dash for Ryde in familiar convoy. We pitch our Lambrettas on the island corner where hundreds of scoots begin to gather. The place is buzzin and we get a scoff at Witherspoons. Andy's` booked digs in Sandown but we soon return to the  custom show. Meet Dai and Elaine from The
AFSC and Si Cuerden outside with bear hug.

Dave from Crawley SC wants pics of the my scoot as he's doing a Scooter Top Trumps I kid you not. I soon
realize Dave's a character of the scene and think, is this bloke really serious. We find 29 different specs
with the machine and I ask for a pack when they're ready.  Back to the digs for the 3 s` and get a taxi back into Ryde. Curry at Witherspoons by the window and watch the camp bus bring in scooterists for the nights`
piss-up. We spot more characters including the skins who are smartly dressed in their Ben Shermans, tank
tops and f..k Off side burns...They look a lot older than the one's I remember at football in the seventies.

After the King Lud and meeting some of my local crowd from Loughbra and Leics, we get into the Marine. This place was heavin` and the music on the decks brill`. Big pie munchin fellas apologising if they bumped into you, unlike the 80`s when things could get ugly.

I split from Andy and Dave to look for the
AFSC up the High Street but return to the Marine. Time for a Club
and we wait an age for the Hipshaker Do. A guy on the decks looks like an SAS man stroke Tosh Lyons from the Bill. Long hair and droopy moustache spinning Mod records. (Later informed he's a top Mod DJ!!).
Brilliant time dancin and get some air outside. Spot Dave again from Crawley and ask how many Street
Racers he's got for a set. He's brought his missus and young lad and we talk scoots and Run's and everything
as the vodka and red bull kick in.

Over to the VFM Do dripping in sweat and it's 2am. Meet up with Si Cuerden again and John, Steve, Ian and others and say my hellos. Our taxi doesn't turn up and its 3.30am still roaming around Ryde. We share a minibus with some lads from Lancs and hit the scratcher at 4am.

Breakfast is scoffed and after 4 hours kip I feel ruff. Make the camp but too hungover to find The  
AFSC det.

I come back to life for the ride-out which brings a lump to the throat seeing hundreds of scoots burnin` petrol and oil. I set the camcorder and capture this moment that for 25 years has been away of life for me.

The noise, the TS1`S, Will from Sunderland on his Skelly, Vespa's 1 up, 2 up, side combos, Tutti Frutti, Deck Chairs at Dawn, the guy from Hull who always wears his Kawasaki leathers, whip aerials, flags, mirrors, lights, South Birmingham SC legshield banners and there goes Crawley Dave with one of his sproggs on
the back. Fan bloody tastic.... It must have taken half an hour for that car park to clear.

Back to the island round about and relax chatting to the lad who owns the Monza GP in the custom show. I
like this machine. The ferry looms and I give 2 cups of oil so a guy can get back to Bristol. This time the seas choppy and the scoots roll around on deck. Return to Aldershot and get drenched passed where the landrovers are parked.

An absolutely brilliant week-end and great meeting The
AFSC and all the other characters that make doing this such a chuckle. We got back Monday and the missus is ironing and asks if I had a nice time...........

Too many smiles.

Thanks Rob Before we kick off with the next write up I am racking my brain to remember a sober moment on the island when I met all the faces that made up The AFSC IOW contingent. Just across from us we met a family of Wesh Guards, brilliant to see you and please get in touch. Big Scotty (and I really mean BIG!) and Fess showed the RAF colors during the run, fantastic to meet you both! Bagzy the Matlo ello ship wreck! Big Ian Duffield, shame you had to leave so quick but it was ace to meet you! Garry Cunningham, Gary we had a great time and cheers for all your support. Rob James, Rob to finally see you on Acid Trip (The scooter not hard drugs!) The Scooter is tops! It will look ace on the top trump cards! also in Scootering when they pull their finger out! Mark and Elaine at Lammy Art are doing the business for us once again with our logo, thanks Mark. Herr General who I think Dave Plenty wants to keep, his first UK run and his first run riding a Lambretta!

Yours Simon Cuerden

By Lisa Botham
IOW made possible by Dia Dave, Borgo Marion and Chris Da Posse

John (are we there yet) Wymark, myself, Ian, and Daz ( I used to be a redcoat) Stocks left Hohne on our way to meet up with the rest of the
AFSC at Paderborn. On arriving at Dempsey Barracks we were greeted by Dai, Elaine, Craig (feet of flames) Ballantyne, Steve Evans, Nutty, Borgo, Marion and the worst rain imaginable. Johnno tipped up to say hi to everyone and was obviously gutted that he wouldn’t be joining us. (Sorry Johnno but you missed a blinder!!). We headed off to our accommodation for the night which had been sorted for us by Dai and Elaine (Cheers guys it was superb). After a few beers we headed off for bed early (ish) in preparation for the journey ahead.

On arrival at Thorney everyone was pretty knackered however we got stuck into the beer and started as we intended to carry on for the rest of the trip! Jimmy the Blade tipped up with Sharon (Hobgoblin) followed by Brookie and Marshy and the beer was soon flowing. Elaine and myself thought it would be a good idea to get stuck into a bottle of Asbach which I regretted the next morning! Elaine, you are one hardcore drinker girl! Simon Cuerden kept us amused all night cracking jokes and basically taking the piss.

Friday morning and what seemed like only half an hours kip we were on the scooters again to catch the ferry. It was proper pissing down but it didn’t seem to dampen the spirits. Craig’s exhaust fell off whilst riding and was promptly squashed by a lorry! (The exhaust not craig). After a hearty English Fry Up next door to Allstyles Scooters we made our way to the port. We arrived at the island and after what seemed like 2 hours finally arrived at the Campsite. Tents were put up and the beer started flowing again. Friday night and it was off to town to meet up with the UK based
AFSC. We started off in the Royal Squadron where we met Dickie Bird, the Crème de Menthe Monster! Craig Ballantyne and Simon Cuerden set the dance floor alight with their moves. After the squadron we headed off to the King Lud (where we should have started the night!) for a few more beers. I met the lads from Macclesfield and we got all misty eyed over our school days. Great to meet yous! Next stop was VFM at the Ice Rink, as we arrived there was a band on stage who were absolutely fantastic although I can’t for the life of me remember the name as we were all very very drunk by this stage. We danced the rest of the night away with our very own Michael Flatley (Ballantyne) leading the way. Poor Simon Cuerden injured his knee whilst strutting his stuff on a carpet dancefloor however I think he was too pissed to notice until Sunday morning! I believe he and Brookie tried to steal a dumper truck at some ungodly hour that morning however we have no photographic evidence and only their word that this actually happened!!

Saturday morning dawned and the weather had at least brightened up a bit. We rode off into town for a bit of lunch and a hair of the dog. An afternoon kip was in order for some of us but as usual the hard core stayed up all day drinking beer and fixing scoots. (Sorry Ian!) Saturday night and we were off to the King Lud again.

Sunday morning and everyone was hanging out their arses. We packed our tents and said our goodbyes. We ended up at a local pub where we were treated so well by the staff and locals who didn’t bat an eyelid at our outrageous behaviour and bad language! As Simon mentioned in his write up we met up with a darling old girl who put on Simon’s jacket and posed on her disabled scooter with a two fingered salute. A memory I will have for a very long time indeed! By the time we reached Thorney Island on Sunday evening everyone was completely knackered but Simon still managed to have us all pissing ourselves laughing with his rendition of “Chitty Chitty Bang Bang” and “Send the Buggers Back (Phoenix Nights)”.

All in all it was a fantastic weekend where we met some cracking people and had what can only be described as a laugh a kin minute.

A special mention must go to the lovely Trifle who was very brave dossing down with us lot. See you at Holland mate!

Cheers Everybody, here’s to next year!
Classic Quotes of the Weekend

Ian Botham to a “surf dude” Sprechen Sie Deutsche Bitte?
Surf Dude Duuuurrrr No
Ian No I fucking can’t either!

Dai Ransom to a Macdonalds Bloke Do you know where Sennelager is?
MacDonalds Bloke No
Dai It’s in Germany

Dai at the IOW ferry waiting to get on. Can everybody get into a lane please!!!!!

General Fck my old boots

Shaz (hobgoblin) Blade Can you play Dance by the Lambrettas
  Connor McPole  
By Simon Cuerden

Gotta say before I even attempt to write about the Isle of Wight that it was my best ever Scooter Run and my head is still spinning with all the stuff from that weekend! The venue was unimportant but seamed magical! The ferry onto the island was more like a time machine to me and the stretch of water crossed seamed the fountain of youth! Yes I know I'm getting all mushy, it's because it seamed to mean so much on many levels. Going to IOW is an occasion in it's self, to go from Germany is a bit special, to travel with a bunch of mad heads is a hoot and to finally meet up with other people who not only share the same interests as each other but who share the same, dare I say "Unique brotherhood"? is the secret invisible ingredient that is hard to explain. No formal and long winded introductions were ever needed, no 'I'm not sure about the look of him" was present, it was instant friendship. I think you call it camaraderie!

IOW nearly End ex Simpson Traffic Cone Crack Hoe

It mattered not how old you were, what Scooter you rode, what cap badge you wore or what service you chose, it was a fantastic time with the only down side being that it was only three days! Most of the AFSC members who attended chose to camp on the VFM site. It should be noted that Steve Foster who co-runs VFM is an ex Signaler who helped our club out immensely with ticket reservations and not getting too exited when me and Brooky tried to steal the Dumper truck from the car park at 0500hrs on Saturday morning! brooky reckoned it was going to be a good idea to drive it into town to find a late bar? My sides were literally sore with laughter that night especially when we had made a three million pint bet to see who would be the last standing at the bar! We settled the bet with pints of sea water, Brooky had to retire early as he swallowed a jelly fish and was sick.

John & Craig Simon B Cool & The Gang Saturday

Friday night was spent in The Squadron Pub and in the VFM do, the music was provided by a number of groups, I didn't see any choosing to rip my kneecap off upstairs in the Northernsoul room. Mental note to self - I am too old to dance on a carpet for eight hours! The majority of the club stayed downstairs and others opted to stay with their own local clubs, big up to Scotty J and the RAF Posse along with Sean Harkness and The Log Dumber! hi John. Dia & Elaine spent a bit of time on the camp site and reported that quite a few scooterists chose the same opting out of the town.

Ian, Daz & Steve Blade & The Hobgoblin Some of the scootz Dia & Elaine
I have an apology to make at this point, I have been banging on and on for the last few weeks about RVing at The King Ludd at 1800hrs on the friday. The problem was three fold, 1 we had most members on the VFM camp site, 2 Most wanted to go for a drink and 3 I was very very drunk. If you were at the King Ludd and didn't see us, please forgive me (I'll buy the beers next time) As far as I'm aware every one met at some time or another on the island? Dave Simons gets a special "Sorry mate" and also Chris who waited both on Saturday night and also Sunday when we had arranged for a photo.
Saturday Demon & Forces Dickie & Dave Is it ride out time?

Thanks to mobile phones a quick co-ord was done and we ended up binning the ride out in favor of a Sunday lunch at the closes pub. One of the funniest things I have ever seen was a local pair of old aged pensioners turned up on their disabled scooters armed with the best sense of humor I have ever experienced. No sooner had they arrived, one had my jacket on and posed on her scooter for a photo complete with a two fingered salute to the camera! Well impressed! The food was good and the banter was top form, Dickie 2 coats and Dave Plenty were on top form and Sharon the Blade made me giggle with here "Hobgoblin" poster!

John Some of the posse Tracy & Trifle visit Steve & Gary
Tracy Round came over to say hello and it was great to see the Speed Demons, Bones was in full flight at the do and he can't have long now to serve, Bones make sure you stay low and move fast in Civ Div! The girls all had a giggle and no one threw any hand bags about even when we had to ride through the worst rain we had seen all year on the trip down! Lisa kept me amused with her no nonsense tongue, ooooh err sounds a bit rude that Lisa! Special thanks for bringing your camping tea pot, Ian and I struggled to get our nads in but it was worth it xxx. Elaine always seamed to have the very thing you had forgotten spare in her bag and is a brilliant ambassador for our club! Trifle graced us with her presence, Dickie recons I don't let any one finish a sentence but your worse than me! great to see you trifle and you still can't spin!
Squadrophenia Pre Ride Out Some of the AFSC AFSC Demonstrator

Simon Brunskill managed to get a Saturday on the island in-between his course and he certainly arrived just as the sun turned the Saturday into a scene from Quadrophenia. We had only a couple of problems with the scooters and as per normal drills Craig "Good Egg" Ballantyne fixed a destroyed clutch supervised by eleven drunken club members advising him on what jets to use! Craig is opening his own Scooter business in Scotland within the next couple of years and will have the full support of us all. As soon as me ed stops thumping and my sides stop aching from laughing I will add to this write up, every one will get a mention as soon as I receive the other photos. brilliant time, privilege to be with you all.

Steve & Marshy The General & Brooky Change your jets Changing jets
Steve Evans Tracy & Trifle Simon Cuerden

AFSC Awards

Tallest man on a scooter run ever! Big Scotty
Most Stella supped (not his) Craig "Fess" Fessey
Most reluctant to leave early Big Ian Duffield
Best find Bagzy the Matlo
Best laser cut AFSC Logo's Mark and Elaine at Lammy Art
Best custom scooter Rob James
Best slang learned Herr General
best dancer but worst spinner Trifle
Best Hobgoblin impression Sharon Foley
best next door neighbors The Wesh Guards crew
Most messed about but eventually found us Dave Simon
Best EFI Moddette on leave from Op telic Chris
Most time spent at The King Ludd Garry Cunningham
Most time spent on nights Dave Plenty
Least time spent on the island Simon Brunskill
Used to be a red coat Daz
Most pints of sea water drunk Brookie
Most Crème de Menthe supped Dickie Bird
Loudest PA system on any scooter Steve Beech
Most disappeared then re-appeared on the run Nutty Newton
Person most wanted to stay another day Marshy
Nicest to see All The AFSC girls
Least sleep all week end Lisa Botham
Most things lent out (Thank you xxx) Elian Ranson
Biggest pill head (still) Charlie Fenton's boy
Feet of fire and hands of oil Craig Ballantyne
Best sandwiches and largest glasses of red wine ever! Craig's brother and sister in law
Still the ccraziest guy (Just beating Lisa Botham) Bones
Best black bin bag dancer Jimmy The Blade
As always top man of the moment we all thank you!! Dia Ranson
Worst knee injury Simon Cuerden
Cleanest t-shirts Steve Evans
Most scariest photograph Connor McPole
Most looked at Connor McPole's photo Ian Botham
Most loved up couple Borgo & Marion
Most Quadrophenia quotes John Wymark